Voice It

I want to get some of your feedback. I want to know your opinions on things. I want to get to know you. I am going to post some opinion questions below and I would appreciate it if you would take a little bit of your time to share your opinions with me. I'd love another point of view. Thanks!

1. Would you ever date someone who is transsexual? Pre-op? Post-op?

2. Which surgeries are you interested in? (If any)

3. How do you feel about the word "passing?"

4. Do you own/want a strap-on?

5. Do you go swimming? If so, what do you wear?

6. Do you wear a binder and/or compression shorts? Do you like them? Would you reccommend it?

7. Do you pack? If so, what do you use to pack with?

8. Are you interested in or do you have an STP device? If you have one, do you like it? And which one do you have?

9. What is your preferred name?

10. Do you plan on taking T?

As I said, I would love to hear from you. I want to post your opinions and things. I want to discuss with my readers. Please, do this little survey. It would mean a lot to me and could help add more depth to this blog.

Email your answers or anything else to TheAidenApocalypse@gmail.com
Thanks again! :D

Sex II

Alright, we're gonna talk about sex. I'm gonna try my best to make this not awkward. I'm not 100% comfortable with this subject so hang in there because I will still present some good ideas.

For bros who haven't had surgery or anything, sex is an uncomfortable topic. I haven't had surgery, nor am I on T. I have a strap-on. You have to have an uncomfortable talk with your partner ahead of time. But most will be fine with that (assuming they already know you're trans). After the awkward discussion, the fun part is next. You have to make sure you have lube or a lubricated condom. Obviously a strap-on doesn't respond like a normal dick does. And after this stuff, you just get to it.

I hate being naked. Hate it. I dread taking a shower every morning. I hate that I can't feel my skin against someone else's during sex. But this is being a transsexual. I don't let people touch me, if you get what I'm saying. I have more of a mental release. I don't really know how to explain it. When the girl (since I'm straight) orgasms, it's like I do too without being touched. It kinda sounds like some other transmen have this too.

If you don't own/want a strap-on, you can always do things with your hands or oral. I just never felt like that was enough for me to feel like a man. You know what I mean? But that's just me.

And if you have had surgery, I can't really help you since you kinda don't need it. You got what you need. This post isn't really for you.

Anything to add? Shoot me an email TheAidenApocalypse@gmail.com

A Look in the Mirror

I found a poem written by an FTM transsexual and I have found it to be heartwrenching. It's beautiful and I hope you will take the time to read and enjoy it. It was written by a transman named Diego.

I look in the mirror but It's not me
I look at the person that they can't see.
The church says no, you can't do that
you can't be Diego, or we'll turn our backs.
We'll kick you out, there's no excuse,
you must stop dreaming, there is no use.
You're not a boy, you're only a girl,
We don't care how much you world will swirl.
With confusion and pain, you cannot change
your gender is girl, anything else Is strange
and will not be tolerated within our walls
you change yourself and we'll make you fall.
I have my dreams of becoming a dad
and becoming a man but to them thats bad.
To them that's wrong, but how can this be?
Doesnt god love everyone? Even me?
If he loves me he'll want me to find my true self
If he loves me he knows me and knows how I felt.
If he knew how I felt then he sees in my eye,
If he see's me then why is he letting me cry?
To me, It's not just changing the way that I dress,
It's letting me sleep at night, letting me rest.
Laying my head down, feeling complete,
Introducing myself confidently to the people I meet.
Going through life atleast knowing my name,
Atleast knowing my identity without any shame.
Memories of pain, memories of sorrow,
Memores of maybe having a different tomarrow.
Nothing has changed, and it never will,
Seems like time has stopped and stood still.
I'll never get out of here, look's like I'm stuck,
Wish life was fair, but I'm all out of luck.

Sex I

I will make some more post about sex. This one isn't really my doing. I'm just giving you information from someone else. I think it's really good. It's for safe sex with transmen/women and their partners. There is a lot of information there, but read it. You'll be glad you did.
http://handbasketproductions.com/Trans%20Sex%20Ed%20%28ezine%29.pdf

Looking For A "Big Brother?"

I have found a mentor program for trans people. You can search for people near you. It's not a dating site, just helpful for you to talk to people who know what you're going through. And maybe they can help you know what to expect.

Just register, make a profile, and there you go. You can put as little or as much information on there as you want. You can send messages to other transguys for free and everything. I think this could be a great resource for you.

I hope you can find whatever kind of help you are looking for with your transition.
The link:
http://www.ftmmentors.org/main/index.php

Feel free to find me and send me a message. My name is Aiden_Apocalypse

Like A Fish

When I was little, I loved swimming. It was always so much fun. But after I realized I was trans, I didn't want to swim anymore. I'm tired of missing out on things I like/want to do. I'm sure there are more people like me out there. Realized you were trans, stopped swimming? Either way I'll give you some times so you no longer have to miss swimming.

Pre chest surgery: Obviously you aren't gonna wear a bikini or any of that stuff. But you can't exactly go shirtless either. Solution: surf shirts, rash guards, unitards, wetsuits, body suits, and/or swimvests. These are better than wearing t-shirts because they are designed to be worn in water and won't become heavy and water-logged (which can be extra bad for those with larger chests). You might need to bind in combination with one of these. On underworks, they have compression swimwear designed for FTMs that you might want to check out.

Some pools have rules against people wearing t-shirts or other "street clothes" in the pool. Check the rules of where you are going before you go. Many bio males keep their shirts on in the water due to sunburn or self-confidence issues. So no one will look at you and judge you (trust me, I've done it).

Packing: When swimming, your trunks tend to cling to your body. This clinging can show off your genital area. You might want to pack while swimming. Your packer needs to be able to be submerged in water without losing shape or taking on water. Most store-bought soft packers would be fine.

Some links for getting swimwear to cover your chest:

www.neosportusa.com

www.scuba.com

www.ftm.underworks.com

www.swimoutlet.com

www.diversdirect.com

Know any more links? Have more to add? Shoot me an email: TheAidenApocalypse@gmail.com

Let me see your hips SWING!

Sad fact: FTMs generally have larger hips than bio males. I know my hips are larger than I would like them to be (especially since I wear skinny jeans). I get quite frustrated with them.

Did you know that there are boxers that you can get that will slim your hips? The lovely website where most FTMs buy their binders, underworks.com, has those boxers. They call them "compression shorts." On that website, they cost $25.

I had been considering getting a pair or two in order to help my hips slim down. I will have to pay for my surgeries and t and everything out of pocket, so I wasn't sure if I wanted to fork over money for those too.

I needed some new boxers, but I didn't want to pay $25 a pair. So I went to Walmart to get some regular boxer-briefs. I was looking around and what did I find? Compression shorts. They aren't designed for FTMs, but I thought, "Why not?" They were only $7 and I didn't really have anything to lose.

I bought a pair. I think they are amazing. They might not give as smooth of hips as the ones designed for us would, but it's enough for me. They are Starter brand. They are made for guys to work out in so they aren't "free-ballin." They come in different colors. I believe they had black, blue, gray, and red. I got the red ones.

I thought you guys might like to know about this great opportunity to acquire some good compression shorts. I mean, there are Walmarts everywhere.

I hope this helped you guys! Have a great day!

The Problem With "Passing"

Alright, there is somewhat of a controversy over the word "passing" when refering to trans people. Some feel like it implies that we are trying to "pass" as something we are not. These people that oppose the word prefer the word "presenting." They feel it is more appropriate.

Honestly, I think this is just stupid. "Passing" is a term that has been used for a long time and I think it still works well. I take it as you are able to "pass" society's standards for what a male/female is. If society can see you as what you want it to, it's like you "passed" a test. I just think it makes sense and is easy.

I don't quite understand "presenting." I get that it's like you're "presenting" yourself as male/female, but how is that any better than "passing?" I just think it is a stupid change that doesn't really make anything better. But that's just my opinion.

Feel free to email me your opinions. I would love to get your opinions on the issue so I could post what you feel too. Or if you feel I left something out, I'd love to know. You will, of course, be credited with whatever you share with me.

So please let me know.
TheAidenApocalypse@gmail.com

FTM Terminology

Binding: flattening one's breast tissue to make a male-appearing chest

Cypionate: Short for testosterone cypionate. One of the most common testosterone types for ftms.

Enanthate: Short for testosterone enanthate. Another one of the most common testosterone types for ftms.

F2M: See "FTM"

Female-to-male transsexual: A person who was born in a female body, but whose gender identity is male.

FTM: Short for "female-to-male"

Gender dysphoria: A term coined by psychologists and medical doctors that refers to the state of discomfort felt by transsexuals and some transgender people caused by the incongruity between one's physical sex and one's gender identity. When you want to make an appointment with a therapist, this is the reason you give them for the need to meet with them.

Gender Identity: One's internal feeling of being male, female, or somewhere in between.

Genderqueer: Someone whose gender identity is neither male or female.

Hermaphrodite: An outdated term for intersexed

Packing: Creating a male-looking/male-feeling bulge in one's crotch

Passing: In FTM terms, being seen as male by others. (Many object to this term and I'll make a post about the controversy)

STP device: Short for "stand-to-pee" device. A device designed to pee into a urinal or toilet standing up.

Stealth: After a transman has transitioned, he may not disclose the fact that he is transsexual to those around him

Shoes And Lifts

Most stores don't carry shoes smaller than a men's size 7. Trans guys tend to have smaller feet than bio males. So it's harder to find shoes. (I'm lucky because I have big feet. Size 9)

The internet is the best place for you to find smaller sizes. First, you should get your feet measured by a professional at a shoe store. If they don't have shoes in your size, go home and order some from online. If they have your size, you're a lucky duck and can choose to get a pair from the store or go home and order some.

Another issue can be helped/solved by shoes: height. You can get lifts for inside your shoes to give you a little more height. You could also get shoes with lifts made into them. The issue with shoes with lifts inside is that only that pair of shoes will add height, where as lifts can be moved from pair to pair. However, shoes with lifts already inside tend to be more comfortable and fit better.

I'm going to focus on the removable lifts because I find them to be a better option. I have a lot of shoes and would like to be taller in all of them. Lifts can be made of cork, plastic, or foam. They should be replaced every few months because of hygienic reasons. You might want to use lifts gradually so you don't get really tall really fast. Lifts can be uncomfortable and might not fit in smaller size shoes.

Obviously there are advantages and disadvantages to both lift options. I find the removable ones better, but that's just my opinion. I'm about 5'6" and would love a little extra height. And I want to be able to wear all my pairs of shoes.

Choose whatever option you like best. Maybe you don't need either because you're tall enough. I hope I helped at least a little.

Here are links to lifts:
http://www.tallerheels.com/
http://www.talleryou.com/
I think the second link has better availible heights and also has sample packs with great deals.


And here are links to lifting shoes:
http://www.elevatorshoes.com/
http://www.walktallshoes.com/
http://www.tallmenshoes.com/
The last link has the most options.

Binder Help

Let's face it, the economy is bad. And binders aren't exactly cheap. After transguys have their surgery, they don't need binders anymore. What do you think happens to those binders? There are sites that will help trans guys get the binders they need. After guys have their surgery, a lot of them donate them to programs that will recycle them and give them to guys that need them. After I have surgery, you can bet I'll be donating my binders. I wish I could have found these programs when I needed them.
I'll link it up for you guys.
http://inabind.transactiveonline.org/
http://www.thetransitionalmale.com/BBUB.html

The first link is for guys 21 and younger. The second is for 22 and up.

Any questions about the programs, ask the people in charge.

Packing

Not all trans guys pack. Personally, I do. There a places all over the web where you can purchase packers. They cost money which you might not have right now. I use a sock right now. I just turn it halfway inside-out. Use a decent sized sock when doing this. Little ankle socks probably won't make any visible difference. I think it works well enough for right now.

If you are packing for the first time, you might want to do a bit of research. Look at pictures of men in swin trunks, underwear, and jeans. You want your pack to look realistic, not like you have a tumor or something.

If you are buying a packer, be realistic. If you are a short guy, don't get the biggest packer you can find! Get one to match your skin tone. They aren't super expensive and will work the best for packing.

In my post about STP devices, I talked about packers that can be used in the restroom. They kill two birds with one stone; they pack your pants AND make it so you can pee standing. They are more expensive but probably worth it over all. I plan on getting one.

Any questions I didn't answer? Shoot me an email. TheAidenApocalypse@gmail.com

STP Devices

STP stands for "stand-to-pee." Having an STP device can be really useful for ftm's. You could potentially use a urinal in the mens restroom. There are different kinds of devices. Some devices you can make at home. Others must be bought. There are two groups of the kind you can buy: packers and non-packers.

If you want to make an STP devise for yourself, you can use a coffe can lid or a plastic disk. Cut the lip off of the lid so that it is flat. The plastic needs to be flexible enough to be rolled up into a funnel or "u-shape." Figure out what rolled up shape works best for you and there you go.

You could also use a medicine spoon to make an Stp. You put the wide end of the spoon up against you and angle the other end downward. You need to practice at home so you don't have leakage. If there are rough edges or a lip on the spoon, you can sand them down. Fine-grit sandpaper should do the trick nicely.

Non-packers do not remain in your underwear all the time. You normally keep them in your back pocket and take them out as you need them. There are different brands and types available:

   - Urinall is a lightweight, hard funnel. It is about the size of a large medicine spoon. It comes with a length of latex tubing that can be removed and replaced. http://www.urinall.com/home/

   - TravelMate is a modification of the medicine spoon. http://www.whenyagottago.com/



   - There are plenty of others, but I don't have time to explain all of them. Here are the links:

http://www.kristascups.com/
http://www.kristascups.com/
http://www.whizproducts.co.uk/en/
http://pee-zees.tripod.com/
http://www.shewee.com/
http://www.freshette.com/
http://www.campmor.com/
http://www.magellans.com/
http://whizzy4you.com/


Now, let's discuss the most popular type of STP's: packers. Most transguys find it's easier to get the STP packer because then you don't have to buy a regular packer and and STP seperately. STP packers can fool men in the restroom and locker room. You don't have to use a stall if you have one of these. They are generally more expensive, but I think they are worth it. You pee through a tube that runs through the shaft. You usually wear a harness with it.

Here are some links:

http://www.toolshedtoys.com/results.php?keywords=stp+packer

http://djknowsdicks.com/



http://www.peecockproducts.com/
http://www.likerealusa.com/
http://www.hg-prosthetics.com/

Mango products is another option, but I strongly suggest against it. People have been complaining about not receiving their paid orders and don't hear back from customer service.

So there are some different options for you to check out. Let me know if you know any other sites or if one of these sites is no good. And I have been getting quite a few page views, thanks guys! Give me any feedback and I hope I have been helping you! Have a great day :D

Support Groups and Chat

I wanted to give you some sites/places where you can connect with other trans people. I am a mamber of some of these (or will be in the future). I'll give you my screen name you you can add me. I like these kinds of sites; they make me feel like I'm not alone. You're not alone, there are others like you, and they are willing to help you. Check them out.

On vampirefreaks.com there is a "cult" of trans people and trans supporters. I post on there a lot. I think it's fun and a great way to discuss things.
My name is: emovamp177 (I made it a long time ago so I know it's a stupid name)
The cult: http://vampirefreaks.com/cult/Support_Trans_Rights

http://transmentors.org/online-support-groups.html

http://www.lauras-playground.com/trans_support_groups.htm

It's called a dating site but I consider it to just be a way to connect with other trans people. It's called transpassions.com.
My name is: AidenApocalypse
Site: http://transpassions.com/

I'll add more sites whenever I find some. The two links that don't have anything written with them I haven't checked out yet, but they seem legit. I'll look at them later and let you know. Or you can let me know in an email.

Some VIdeos

I have found a couple videos that I would like you to watch. They are FTM videos. I found them inspirational/beautiful and I hope you will too.

http://youtu.be/2xpf2aYbyWk


http://youtu.be/UHIhf7u6E00


And this video has good tips:

http://youtu.be/6HgkX--VZaQ

Changing Your Name

There are certain organizations that you need to notify about a name change. Everyone who has to change their name (for whatever reason) has to notify the same groups.
A few you NEED to remember:
- Social Security
- Drivers License
- Passport
- Post Office
- IRS
- Voter Registration
- Banks
- Credit Cards
- Doctors
- Insurance Companies
- State Tax Board
- Clubs
- Memberships
- Employer
- Retirement plans
Changing your name on your social security card is not legally changing your name. You need a court oreder name change.

Many organizations may have issues with you changing your name. It's your right to change your name so try to:

1. Show documentation of your new name
2. Discuss the state laws that support your name change in a non-confrontational manner
3. Speak with someone who is in charge, like a supervisor
4. A local official or state representative may be a successful last resort

Well there you have it. If you have questions about anything, make sure to ask them. You will save a lot of trouble if you ask the people at offices questions before you do anything. Use your head.

Therapist Surgery Letter

   I found this while searching on the internet. It has taken me a really long to find an example of what has to be in the letter for surgery. I thought it might save you guys some time if I shared it with you.


[Name, address, and phone number]

Dear [ Dr. Preforming Surgery]:

   [Patient name] is a [Patients appropriate age] year old female to male transgender individual who has established a longstanding and strong identity as male. He has been living as male consistently and on hormones since [date patient start HRT or social transition]. He has had [if any previous surgeries put here with dates if no other procedures remove this line]. He is now seeking [name of surgery] to aid in his complete medical transition.
   [Patient name] reports a prior history of anxiety which appears to have been in response to the stressors during his early stages of transitioning. He was entered into therapy in [date patient began therapy]. At this time, he presents with no apparent residual psychiatric symptoms and is quite stable. He intends to continue his therapy regime which he believes has been helpful.
   [Patient name] seems to have significant progress in his transitioning and seems very happy in his decision to be male. He has a strong support system that includes a loving partner and family. He has steady employment that provides his benefits and is attending school for his professional aspirations. His judgment appears sound and good. He has good knowledge of, and had the ability to follow to Standards of Care for surgery.
   I met with [Patient name] for an evaluation on [date of evaluation] . I have no hesitation in recommending him for the procedure he has requested. He meets and exceeds the criteria as set forth by the Harry Benjamin International Gender Dysphoria Association. If you need any more information or have questions, please do not hesitate to contact me at [therapist phone number].

Sincerely,

[Therapist name], [qualifications]

Therapists

So there are tons of great therapists out there. I have found huge lists all over the web. I'll give you links to some of those lists at the end of this post. I want to talk about some therapists that look really good, have good reviews, or just seem interesting that you might want to check out. I'll try to get at least one for every region of the U.S. Hope it helps.


Online:

John D Moore LCPC, CADC
E-mail: john@johndmoore.net
Website: http://www.johndmoore.net/
You must be a resident of Illinois


http://www.gendertherapist.com/


Caroline Gibbs
Transgender Institute
7140 Wornall Road, Suite 203
Kansas City, MO. 64114
Phone : (816) 305-0943Email : gibbsassist@yahoo.com
She does appointments using Skype. She will provide you with a Skype camera free of charge.


B.E. Budd
699 B Piedmont Ave, NE
Atlanta, Ga. 30324
Phone : (404) 873-5517
or
1216 Mars Hill Road, #C
Watkinsville, Ga. 30677bebudd@bebuddphd.com
http://www.bebuddphd.com/ 


South East:

Daniel McKeever, Ph.D.
Hill Crest Associates
6869 5th Avenue South
Birmingham, AL. 35212
Phone : (205) 838-2031

Margaret Morgan-Cohen, LCSW
210 Pulaski St.
Little Rock, AR. 72201
Phone : (501) 255-0561
Website : http://www.margaretmorgancohen.com

Jennifer McBlaine MA, RMHCI
Diplomate, American Board of Clinical Sexology
Professional Counseling Centers of Sarasota/Manatee
1808 Orchid Street
Sarasota, FL 34239
Phone : (941) 951-0548jennifer@sextherapysarasota.com
http://www.sextherapysarasota.com 

Joel Bagby
7193 Douglas Blvd, Suite 205
Douglasville, GA. 30135
Phone : (404) 920-0551

Northeast:

Gary E. Alger, M.Div., LADC, CEAP
Counseling Psychotherapy EAP
670 Prospect Avenue
Hartford, CT. 06105
Phone : (860) 233-4022
Cell : (860) 309-7655garyalger@sbcglobal.net

Amy L. Herb, L.C.S.W.
4735 Ogletown-Stanton Road
Medical Arts Pavilion 2, Suite 1201
Newark, DE. 19718
Phone : (302) 623-4335aherb@christianacare.org

Maine Gender Resource and Support Service
c/o Jean Churchill
P.O. Box 1894
Bangor, ME. 04402-1894

Midwest: (My area)

Michele O'Mara, LCSW
2680 E. Main Street, Suite 121
Plainfield, IN. 46167
Phone : (317) 517-0065
TG Counseling : http://www.transgenderindiana.com
michele@micheleomara.com
Main Website : http://www.transgenderindiana.com
Net Counseling : http://omaram.hypermart.net/thelesbiantherapist/online-counseling/
orhttp://www.onlinegendercounseling.com
Her online scheduler : http://www.appointmentquest.com/provider/2000319224
Social Networking Website : http://www.genderconnection.com

Milwaukee Transgender Program
Gretchen Finke, MSSW
Roger Northway, MS
Pathways Counseling Center
2645 N. Mayfair Road, Suite 230, First Financial Building
Milwaukee, WI. 53226-1304
Phone : (414) 774-4111
This is what I'm looking into for myself.

Willow Counseling Services, LLC
Veronica L. Senkyr, MA, LMFT
1821 University Ave. W., S329
St. Paul, MN. 55104
Phone : (651) 647-1022vsenkyr@willowcounselingservices.com
http://www.willowcounselingservices.com

Southwest:

Lewis Nemes, Ph.D.
8005 Pennsylvania Circle, NE
Albuquerque, NM. 87110
Phone : (505) 248-0698

Gender Center Of The Southwest
Transitions Medical and Counseling Associates
3626 Nort Hall Street, Suite 623
Dallas, TX. 75205
Phone : (214) 528-8901

West:

Roberta Vande Voort, MS MFT
AAMFT Approved Supervisor
9402 W. Lake Mead Blvd.
Las Vegas, NV. 8914
Phone : (702) 878-0554roberta@kayentabhc.com
http://www.kayentabhc.com/index.html

Joshua M. Simmons, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist (PSY 23334)
3821 23rd Street
San Francisco, CA. 94114
Phone : (415) 820-1554drsimmons@sftherapy.info
http://www.sftherapy.info

There are tons and tons more. I just wanted to list some of them for you. Find one in your state/near you.

Here's the link to the list that I used for this post: http://www.lauras-playground.com/gender_therapists.htm

Some states don't have any listed. You should always check other lists and google search. Make sure you find the right therapist for you.

The 3 Magic Steps

There are three general steps to transitioning: thearapy, hormone treatment, and surgery. I will outline the steps and how to go about them. I haven't gone through them yet, but I have a job and am saving every dollar for it.

1. Therapy:
   - You may be thinking to yourself "I don't need therapy, I already know everything I need to." WRONG! You can learn a lot through therapy, if you have a good therapist.
   - Now is the time to make sure this is what you really want. Some of the changes from Testosterone are permanent, so be 100% sure this is what you want before you move on to step 2.
   - This part won't be fun: calling to set up your appointment. You have to be brave and make the call. When they ask what you need to be seen for, you must tell them "Gender Dysphoria" or "Gender Issues."
   - Depending on the person, this step could take months or longer. It's life changing and shouldn't be taken lightly.
   - You may lose family. You may lose some gay friends if you are active in the gay community. You could lose your job. You could get harassed at school. The list never ends, but if you want to transition, just do it. Be strong.
   - You will face challenges. Be brave and face them head-on!
   - I will be posting more about therapy and therapists soon.


2. Testosterone Hormone Therapy:
   - I have posted a bit about testosterone on this blog. Please make sure to look at those posts.
   - Get the letter of recommendation for hormone therapy from your therapist. That letter will halp you get your prescription for testosterone.
   - Testosterone is a steroid; it's not to be played around with.
   - T is a safe drug when it is used under supervision and is controlled. So use the correct dosage and see your doctor as regularly as you are told to.
   - The changes take years, taking more will not make changes happen faster. You could end up really ill or dead.


3. Surgery:
   - Quite a few surgeons require you to have had hormone therapy before they will operate on you, but just as many don't require it.
   - If you were planning chest surgery first, you don't need to be on testosterone (in most cases) before surgery.
   - You need to have a letter from your therapist recommending you for surgery before a surgeon will operate on you.
   - You can read about the types of surgeries in my "Types Of Surgeries" post.


If I missed anything, send me an email. TheAidenApocalypse@gmail.com

Risks Of Taking Testosterone

Testosterone can be an FTM's best friend, but there are risks and some possible side effects that you need to be aware of. Knowing these risks can help you make an educated decision on whether you want to take it or not.

1. Testosterone can increase the risk of heart disease, diabetes, and stroke.
2. It can increase hemoglobin and red blood cells.
3. Testosterone can cause or worsen headaches and migraines.
4. It might increase the risk of some types of cancer (however, it has not been proven).
5. T can negatively affect mental health.
6. There can be social consequences due to transphobic people.

Due to all of these health risks, it is very important to get regular check ups with your doctor. Your doctor can help make sure none of these issues get too unbearable.

Also, another risk of taking testosterone could be death. Make sure you use the proper dosage as it is prescribed to you. DO NOT order testosterone from the internet or anything. You don't know for sure what is being sent to you. Only use T if you have a perscription.

Using T is your decision. Many transmen choose to use it, but many also choose not to. Personally, I plan on using it because I really hate my voice.

If you start taking it and decide you don't like the way it makes you feel, stop taking it. Most of the changes are reversable. See my "Changes From Testosterone" post to see which things will go back to how they were before.

As always, feel free to shoot me an email if you have any questions. :D

Surgeons

I will be listing some of the top surgeons for FTM surgeries. I'll say what they will perform (top, bottm, etc.) and contact info. I might add some pictures too. I'll tell what I have heard about each surgeon (if I have heard anything). I hope this list will help you.

Dr. Beverly A. Fischer, M.D.
Advanced Center for Plastic Surgery
12205-12207 Tullamore Rd.
Timonium, MD 21093
0r
2 Colgate Dr.
Suite 101
Forest Hills, MD 21050
Ftm top surgery
I have seen a lot of her work in photo galleries. It seems to vary greatly. I have seen amazing/perfect surgeries, but I have also seen surgeries that I thought looked very poorly done. The best and worst surgery photos I have seen have come from her.
http://www.beverlyfischer.com/



Dr. Yvon Menard, M.D.
Dr. Pierre Brassard, M.D.,
1003 East Boulevard St. Joseph, Montreal,
Quebec, Canada H2J 1L2
Phalloplasty, Metoidioplasty, Clitoral Freeing Procedures, Mastectomy
http://www.grsmontreal.com/anglais.html





Daniel A. Medalie, MD
Assistant Professor of Plastic Surgery
Metrohealth Medical Center
Case Western Reserve University
http://www.clevelandplasticsurgery.com/transgender-surgery



 
Dr. Raphael
1600 Coit St 105
Plano, Tx 75075
Ftm top surgery




John G. Gregory, MD, FACS
Deaconess Institute of Sexual Medicine
6125 Clayton Ave., #141
St. Louis, MO 63139



Eugene A. Schrang, M.D., S.C., Theda Clark Regional Medical Center
125 E. Forest Avenue
Neenah, WI 54956
Ftm top surgery
I was considering going there because it's pretty close to home and he seems pretty skilled.




Dr. Kenneth L. Stein
414 N. Orleans, Suite 209
Chicago, IL 60610


Dr. Alan N. Wilson
Detroit Medical Center,
573 Fisher Theater Building,
Detroit, MI 48202





Dr. Marci Bowers
406 First National Bank Building
Trinidad, CO 81082.
Ftm bottom and Mtf surgeries
http://www.marcibowers.com/grs/gender.html


Dr. Gary Alter
435 N. Bedford Dr. Suite 300
Beverly Hills, CA, 90210
http://www.altermd.com/

           


Dr. RE Moulton-Barrett, MD
2070 Clinton Av, Alameda, CA 94611
http://moulton-barrett.com/



These are obviously not all of the surgeons available. I just wanted to give you some to start looking at and comparing.

Changes From Testosterone

I want to give you a brief overview of the changes that may/will result from the use of testosterone and the changes that will stay if you choose to stop using it.


Changes that occur while you're on Testosterone:

• Facial hair growth
• Voice deepening
• More body hair growth
• Enlargement of the clitoris
• More muscle mass
• No more periods
• Possible hair loss and male pattern baldness
• Body fat moves from hips to abdomen
• Skin may become more oily
• Increase in red blood cells
• Cholesterol changes
• Scent of body odor and urine may change (that's kind of a weird one)
• Skin may become rougher
• Increase in your sex drive

You could have any combination of the above results. You may not notice them right away, but you should see at least a few changes.
Some things only occur for some transmen, but don't happen super often. These include:

• More angular face
• More energy
• Larger feet/hands
• Become hungrier
• Slight decrease in density of breast tissue
• Emotional changes

If you choose to stop taking T, some of the changes are permanent and some are not.


Voice: should stay at the deepness it has reached due to T use
Facial/body hair: The hair that is already there will continue, but new areas of hair will not grow.
Clitoris growth: should stay at the same length and thickness
Muscle/fat changes: will revert back to more feminine states
Hair loss: If you have lost hair while on T, it will most likely not grow back upon quitting.
Menstrual cycle: If the ovaries are still in working condition, periods will return
Skin oils/acne: may decrease
Body scent: may change
Sex drive: may decrease

FAQ

People ask a lot of questions about transgenderism and it's hard to know what to say to answer them. Transgenderism is hard for friends and family to understand, but it is also hard for the trans person as well. I will try to help answer trans people's questions and help them know how to answer their loved ones' questions.

1. What causes transgenderism?
         - Nothing has been proven to cause it. People speculate that it is genetic, just like homosexuality.
        - I had a discussion with my amazing Psychology teacher and he gave me his ideas. It has been proven that homosexuality happens in the womb. You get two washes of testosterone if you are a male. One changes your body and the other changes your brain. He thinks that this is what happens to transgender people. One part changes, and the other doesn't.

2. After surgery, will everyone consider me a male/female?
    - No. No matter what you do, some people just won't accept you. Some people just suck.

3. What did I do wrong as a parent?
    - Nothing. Some kids are trans; it just happens. Once you accept that, you can move on from there. They are still your kid and are still amazing. Love them for who they are.

4. Why can't I be normal?
   - I have asked myself this question many times. But do you know what I have realized? No one is really "normal." Everyone has quirks and habbits and things that make everyone different. You are never alone; there are many other trans people that go through the same things you do. And being "normal" is overrated anyway!


These are all the questions I have right now. If I have missed any of your questions, shoot me an email. I hope these have helped you.
TheAidenApocalypse@gmail.com

Surgery Types

I will be discussing a few different types of surgery and will probably add more information later.

There are three general types of surgeries:
1. Chest reconstruction surgery (sometimes called top surgery or male chest contouring)
2. Hysterectomy and oophorectomy (removing the uterus and ovaries)
3. Genital reconstruction surgery (sometimes called bottom surgery)

Within the Chest reconstruction surgery group, there are two subgroups:
1. Double incision/Bilateral mastectomy
2. Keyhole/Peri-areolar incision

Double incision/Bilateral mastectomy:

• usually used for guys with larger chests (usually B or higher)
• two incisions are made across the breasts, right below the nipples
• the skin is peeled back and the fatty tissue is removed, using a scalpel
• the skin is then trimmed and put back over the chest

Pros:

- best method for guys with large chests
- muscle growth and hair growth can help hide scars
- resizing and placement of the nipples make the chest more masculine looking

Cons:

- huge scars
- little or no nipple sensation
- may require revision
- areas of numbness
- appearance of puckering along the scars

Keyhole/Peri-areolar:

• effective for individuals with small chests (cup A or smaller is preferred, but a lot of surgeons will do size B)
• incisions are made around the areola
• fatty tissue is "scooped" out
• areola might be sized down
• skin is pulled taut toward the incision
• the incision is closed

Pros:

- minimal scarring
- sensation in the nipples

Cons:

- nipple placement might not be ideal
- possibility of sagging skin
- chest may not appear completely flat
- may need revision
- risk of nipple loss

Genital reconstruction surgery:
1. Metoidioplasty
2. Centurion
3. Phalloplasty

Metoidioplasty:

• clitoris grows because of testosterone
• the ligament holding the clitoris is cut, bringing the clitoris forward
• it will look like a small penis
• scrotal implants may be available

Pros:

- unassisted erection when aroused
- natural looking
- no visible scars

Cons:

- too small for penetration
- sometimes the clitoris doesn't get big enough by using testosterone


Centurion:

• round ligaments are freed from the labia majora and brought together along the shaft of the clitoris
• it provides girth
• the extraction of the round ligaments leaves a pocket
• silicone scrotal implants are placed into the pocket
• a urethral extension is made by using a catheter, which will be removed when it is healed

Pros:

- natural looking
- erotically sensate penis
- unassisted erection
- no visible scars

Cons:

- too small for penetration
- sometimes clitoris doesn't get big enough by using testosterone

Phalloplasty:

• many different types
• Gillies: flap of abdominal skin is rolled into a tube to create a penis
• Suitcase handle: improvement on the Gillies, flap is attached to the abdomin for a few weeks for proper blood supply and then released to hang down
• Free tissue flap transfer: more recent and improved; a flap of skin is removed, nerves and blood vessels in tact, and transferred to the groin area
• MLD flap: skin is taken from the torso, under the arm; considered to produce the most realistic looking penis; more erotically sensate
• scrotoplasty: paired with the phalloplasty; labia majora hollowed out and silicone implants are inserted to create a scrotum

Pros:

- average-sized penis
- realistic looking
- can urinate through
- can engage in penetrative sex

Cons:

- multiple surgical visits
- may need revisions
- expensive
- scarring
- pain
- long time for recovery

Personally, I am planning to get peri-areolar chest surgery and the MLD phalloplasty. The chest surgery will leave little scarring and that's what I want (also I have a small chest). The MLD is the best bottom surgery available. The pros outweigh the cons for me.

Even though I told you what I want for myself, only you can decide what's best for you. Even if you choose not to have any surgery, you will always be a man. Think very seriously about all your options before you make the choice. Surgery is serious and can not be undone.